


Xenobiology

by PrinceDel



Series: Greetings from New Mexico [2]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Just a short drabble, New Mexico's part alien wooooah
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-11
Updated: 2014-10-11
Packaged: 2018-02-20 17:16:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2436623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrinceDel/pseuds/PrinceDel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Doctor Grey gets excited and New Mexico is scared. Yeah, they're connected.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Xenobiology

Mexico had hoped for a little time to get used to things; maybe eat something like Donut had implied, or even just running drills with soldiers. The mess hall never seemed so far away as when Carolina called for Doctor Grey.

"This is Agent New Mexico," she claps him on the back, making him sway forward just a bit. "He needs a full physical."

"Great!" The woman cheers, grabbing the aforementioned man by his arm. "Hope you're not freaked out by needles! Or knives." He wishes his visor didn't hide his pleading look, but he's sure the sentiment is there when he just gets snickers. "Let's go!"

* * *

 

They were a little worried when they heard an excited yell from Grey, who then ran to them in the mess hall. "He's got alien in him!"

"Oh hell no," Tucker starts, furrowing his brow. "That's my thing. Nobody else is taking it."

"I don't think she means inside of him, Tucker." Washington shakes his head, but then looks to Grey. "...You don't, right?"

"No, sillies!" She claps her hands, bouncing slightly. "He's - oh, I have to show you! It's amazing!" Once more she's gone, to retrieve New Mexico from Med Bay and present whatever was so amazing.

After echoing squawks he was shoved forward, his hairs bristling from the nervousness of being thrown into a public space with only pants on. She immediately grabs his wrist to present his hand, spreading his fingers with her own. "Look! Only four fingers. Two thumbs!"

"Holy shit," Grif finally says, all of them staring at the man. Caboose gasps and points.

"Oh my gosh! What did you do with his nipples, doctor lady?!"

"Caboose, you fucking idiot." Most of them shake their heads at Caboose, who's still pointing at Mexico's chest.

"I've never seen such a complex hybrid!" She continues, still messing with his hand, "oh, I just can't wait to give you a vivisection!" His eyes widen.

"Shouldn't - shouldn't I be dead for that?" His hair lays flat against him at that, grabbing the attention of her hands as she curiously touched them.

"No, silly. That's an autopsy!" She giggles, pulling at one of the hairs on his elbows and causing them to ruffle before looking back to the others. "His blood is purple, cand you believe it?"

"Wait, are you a Sangheili?" Tucker questions, leaning forward. "'Cause, again, that's my domain. I'll fight you."

Mexico shakes his head. "Kig-Yar," he pulls away from Grey slightly, "only partly."

"Wait," Carolina stands from her seat, easily drawing attention to her words, "You're an _alien_? An alien freelancer?"

"Partly," He corrects weakly, folding his arms over himself. He yelps when Grey suddenly grabs his calf.

"Look at his feet!" She excitedly presents his feet the same way as his hands. Long and capable of grabbing, and deceptively more resemblant of digitrade than plantigrade out of armor.

"An alien." Carolina repeats, holding her arms out in disbelief. "How could that go unnoticed?"

"He did run off early on." Wash offers, causing the hybrid to deflate slightly. "And probably the same way he's been here for so long."

"What, cowardice?" Mexico flinches at her tone, but manages to not take offense. He knew he was a coward.

"Hiding." Wash answers, not necassarily disagreeing. "That's what he was always the best at. He used to disappear for days only to end up being asleep in the kitchen."

Grif gives a pleased hum. "You've got my respect, dude."

"That's not saying much."

"Less than saying much, Simmons!" Sarge quickly adds, "It's an insult! You should be insulted, you alien freak!" Mexico stares at him.

"Can I put my armor back on?" He mutters to Grey, shifting his weight anxiously. "You said I was healthy, so..."

She sighs, her shoulders moving with it in a dramatic display of defeat. "Sure. But don't think you can avoid a vivisection forever!" He puts his genetic agility to good use at that.

"Are you going to give his nipples back to him?" Caboose asks in a hushed tone, getting sighs and groans in return.

 

* * *

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Ha ha no nip Mexico


End file.
